I don't know what to do about my boyfriend.  We have a lot in common and we get along great.  But, we have been dating for 4 years, and I want to get married and have children (I'm pushing 40), but I have never even met his family.

Propose to him.  If he turns you down, you need to break it off and start dating someone new.  Four years is too long to wait.

I am getting married in August.  When we were first dating I was so in love, and I was very excited when he proposed to me.  But the closer it gets to the wedding date, the more ambivalent I feel, like I might as well marry him, after all, no one else wants to marry me.  He isn't my first choice, he isn't even my second.  When I put my engagement announcement in the paper, I was really hoping that my old boyfriend would call and say "No!  Marry me instead!", but it didn't happen.  Is this normal pre-wedding jitters?

No!  Don't send out those invitations!  Postpone the wedding until next year.

Before my husband and I got married, we would have long talks about our life together, and cuddle on the couch and watch TV.  The second we got married and moved into our house, he treats me like a servant or cleaning lady, and he won't have sex with me.  It's been 2 months of marriage and I am miserable.  What do I do?

Move out and get an annulment.  Marriage counseling can't help someone who hasn't had sex with you in 2 months.

My girlfriend is driving me crazy.  She is gorgeous and sexy, and great in bed, but the rest of the time she is just annoying.  I don't want her coming with me to happy hour all the time, I don't want to hear about her day at work.  I don't listen to a word she says, why can't she just stand there, be quiet and look pretty?

If you are just not that into her, then you need to break up with her.

My old girlfriend called and wants to go out with me again.  When we were engaged in college, she cheated on me, got pregnant and married someone else.  Now, 2 kids later, she is getting a divorce and wants me back.  Should I give her another chance?

NO!  If she cheated on you once, she will do it again.  Stay clear.

I have been married for 6 yrs to a great girl. Before we got married though I met and hung around another girl, just friends, but we work with each other I have always had feelings for her but not of a romantic nature but I seem to now have some . She is married to but I think she has the same feelings . I don't know what to do.

This April my only brother who was just turning 20, October 1, committed suicide. it is the hardest thing to overcome, and I act so strong to people but I just cant get over it one bit, his room, things he made me, pictures, they all make me BURST OUT CRYING.  everyone tells me I should be ok now, but I'm not! I don't know where to turn, it's like I have none to talk to that helps me, they usually make it harder, could you help me attempt to overcome my brothers death.

-- I am so sorry for your loss.  You need to find a grief counselor, and join a grief group.  They can help you work through a plan of dealing with your brother's death.  You need to understand that he died of a serious illness, it's called depression.

I just like to know what I can do to save my marriage. The problem that I have is that I don't know how to respond to my husbanding taking "co-workers" women out to a nice dinner and drinks and he stays out till-midnight. He says it is business and brushes it off and when I try to express how I feel he tells me to get over it. Well I feel that maybe he is not interested in me anymore seeing he has never taken me out to a nice dinner and drinks. He is nice to everyone he meets and puts his best foot out there. I don't know what I should do to get overcome this in my life. I have three children and what ever I do they will be affected. I love them and want to spare them any hurt.

-- If he won't go to marriage counseling, then you need to get into counseling for yourself, and get a lawyer to protect your assets

When I was 11, I had a supposed *best mate* who I personally thought I got on well with but she called me boring & moody so one day I figured I should not take that from her & ditched her. Through the next year I came from feeling awkward, shy & hating who I was to sexy *laughs!*, happy & free by teaching myself how. I found lots of new friends who appreciate & love me & a new best mate who idolizes me & thinks I'm awesome and tells me she wants to be like me. I finally felt I loved myself but I still didn’t have all the glory I thought I needed, I was still searching for something more! So I tried to change myself even though I loved it & now I think I’m just confident but not content. I HATE IT but love it when my best mate says she wants to be like me;; its a tangled load of emotions, to go from a best mate who trashed who I was to some one who loves it so much she wants to be like me! I guess some part of me didn’t think I deserved it & a feel that a part of me will always believe that I am moody & boring because some one I loved & trusted and I thought knew  me told me so. I get nervous talking to boys because the fears of what she told me always make me afraid to talk to them too much or trust them in case they tell me the same. I don’t value her or like her anymore but she wrecked something for me & I don’t know because she is a very insecure person but sometimes other people call me moody and its so hard for me because it backs up a belief i already have!  I guess I wont ever feel good enough unless I’m good enough for them which is ironic because most of me feels good enough just not that part... help me please!

-- Who are you now?  You are a young teenager who is trying to find herself.  You are emotional and moody, and that is normal.  Don't let one bad comment from an ex-friend define your personality.  If you are really worried, here are some books you can read:  Marla Paul The Friendship Crisis, The Art of Making and Keeping Friends, 
Friendship: How to Make and Keep Friends by Herbert M. Dawley, Mike Frazier

I started seeing this guy about 4 months ago and we used 2 text every day without fail and now he never bothers 2 even text me back so I have 2 call him 2 speak 2 him! its great while I'm with him but it's horrible when I'm not! does he still want 2 be with me or am I being paranoid? I really care about him and I don't want 2 lose him!

-- At the beginning of a relationship, you are in a "sparkly" stage, when you can't get enough of each other.  Relax a little.  If you appear to clingy, he will run for the hills.

I've been involved with a guy for 3 years.  He finally told me he wasn't interested in pursuing a real relationship because I am diabetic and because of my heart rate unable to workout.  (I'm 120lbs and 5'6")  (I'm not fat.)  He works out a lot.  He's a liar.  A cheater.  What I want to know is how to close the door and get over  the pain he has caused me.  I've never been ashamed of my disease and now feel like it is something I should apologize for.  I feel like I need to tell him what a jerk he is. . .but just can't.  How do I let him know what he said is very cruel.  I asked him to tell me the truth...but seriously who says that to someone?

I have a dilemma. I just found out that my supervisor's brother has been thinking about asking me out on a date. I'm not sure what to do. My supervisor was the person who told me about him. She asked me if she could talk to me about something in private. When we were alone, she told me that her brother and her had been talking and he asked her if she knew if I was dating anyone. She told him that as far as she knew I wasn't so he told her that he has been thinking about asking me out. She asked me if it would be ok with me if she gave him my # and he could call me. I thought about it for a minute and thought why not so I gave her the number to give to him. Then my supervisor kind of surprised me by telling me that she wanted to warn me about him. she told me that he is a "player" and she doesn't want me to get hurt because she thinks I'm really nice.  Any way, he called me about two weeks later but I wasn't home so I didn't get to talk to him and I haven't returned his call yet because I don't know what to do. On one hand, I could call him back and we get to know each other better and things are good or on the other hand, I could call him and we date for a while and then break up. I don't want my supervisor to feel like she has to pick sides with someone because that would make things very uncomfortable all around. What should I do?

-- I guess I don't understand why your Supervisor would suggest going out with him, if he is a "player".  If he weren't her brother, would you be interested?  Don't date him if you feel obligated, but don't pass up a great opportunity just because it could be awkward.  Go with your gut feeling.

My wife & I have recently divorced after a six year separation, with her living with our son in the family home, while I live in a single bed-sit. I don't earn enough to get a 2nd mortgage, & don't want to disrupt my sons life. What can I do to get my half of the equity of our house, so that I can provide for a better standard of living for when my son visits me?

-- You need to get an attorney to help you divide the assets equitably and fairly.

My Chihuahua gave birth to three puppies recently, ad since the puppies were born, my male has not been eating like he was, before the puppies were born. He's acting normal in every other way except eating. Before the birth of the puppies, I had no problem, getting him to eat. I don't know why this is happening to him, and it's beginning to really scare me. I'm really desperate for some answers. Can anyone help? Serious Answers Only Please!!!

-- If he isn't eating, you need to take him to the Vet.  It may be completely unrelated to the puppies being born.

My Chihuahua has been nursing her 41/2 week old puppies without a problem. The puppies are teething, and now when she tries to nurse, she is very restless and acts like the puppies are hurting her. She still nurses them, but not as much as she was before or as long as before. I just started the puppies on dry dog food mixed with wet
> food and water until it's soft and mushy. Is it safe to also put out some plain dry puppy food and water without having to worry about them choking? Of coarse I'll watch them at first, but will they be ok with it when they are alone? Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Serious Answers Only Please!!!

-- Once the teeth have erupted at about 4 weeks of age, the animal may begin to
eat solid foods.

At age 4-5 weeks, offer either canned puppy/kitten food mixed with formula or human baby food (chicken or beef) mixed with formula. Serve warm. Feed 4-5 times a day if not taking a bottle. If still bottle-feeding, offer this at first 2 times a day and continue to bottle-feed at the other feedings. Slowly progress to feeding solid mixture more often, less bottle-feeding. At this age, the animal needs to have its face cleaned with a warm moistened cloth after feedings. Kittens usually begin to clean themselves after feedings when they are 5 weeks old.

At age 5-6 weeks, the animal should begin to lap. Offer either canned kitten/puppy food or moistened kitten/puppy chow. Feed four times a day. Have dry kitten/puppy chow and a bowl of shallow water available at all times.

By 6 weeks of age, most puppies are able to eat dry food.

http://www.animaldefenseleague.org/newborn.htm

Lengthy problem. . . engaged 1 year. Cannot communicate on real level with fiancé, and his family drives me crazy they don't get me either. Don't know how to break cycle, not sure a good way to leave if I need to. Not sure if I have the problem and should seek what kind of help?
 
He is a 'funnyman' but is really robotic, not emotive or feeling. I am really confused by it. It's mostly happy and cutesy but feels very 'surface' to me. I feel unable to speak my mind because we will fight. If I say I should go, he gets emotional for 1 second and then coolly says 'fine, go again'. You see, I have left several times due to not seeing him express feelings and our basic differences (I am physical art health spiritual, he tech, machines, sales, movies junk food ). I don't know what to do. If I bring it up and try to stay and work it out, he gets very mad. He wants me to stay and just accept it.
 
He says 'i cannot be this passionate talk about feelings guy' He thinks I constantly raise the bar of expectation and he never 'gets' what he has to do to make me happy. He really lacks the ability to empathize. Maybe I do? I think he is defensive and uncomfortable with people explaining their side he always thinks its them being difficult.
 
He is physically warm but he dictates it - All interaction he allows is funny joking 'tag lines' and mandatory cuddling and kisses 'that make a smoochy noise' but don't cause any fire. I want some real passion and excitement and deep communication, honesty and working through real problems that arise. If I try for this he says 'not now', 'in a few days', and whines and says 'don't wreck today, please'.
 
We have some sex, not enough, dull, boring. It doesn't help we sleep downstairs from his brother. It started great, sort of. 10 year relationship, on and off since I was 19 he 20. Started with major problems such as his drug use, my depression. Made it through 8 moves pregnancies and miscarriages and many jobs and now we are a lot  better off stability-wise.
 
Finally, this year, I was fed up making money for him to blow, I quit working in corporate world and he made enough money and stayed at a job long enough for me to work only part time and take school.  We afford this by living in his brother's (and family's) basement.
 
In 10 yrs we broke up 3 times. He cheated on me then dumped me and recovered from drugs. Twice he saw someone else. I've been with 9 other men - varying degrees of seriousness - I cheated a few times during these 9 years - flings and a LOVE. (he died last year, not in picture).
 
Mostly when I stay I feel empty, don't know how to fix it, get tired and try to leave.  Don't want to give up really though or hurt him. He is a very happy go lucky does a lot of things right makes everybody laugh kind of guy with a brilliant mind and good looking if a bit lax about his appearance.

I don't want to hurt him and he has made huge improvements over 10 years but I'm only 29... And now that I make so little money I feel stuck here in a small town in his brothers basement. He says he's trying hard to make us more money but "I don't help him". I feel like its finally time to let him handle it and do my own projects instead of helping him on what he decides is important.  HELP any advice appreciated

-- The baseline is, you are not happy and you need to get out. After ten years
together, your relationship should be better, not worse. You should build
each other up, not tear each other down. I hope you have supportive friends and family. Good luck!

I married my second husband 2 years ago, and he is the step father of my 3 children. We are arguing over my 17 year old boy.  His room is in the basement of our house.  My husband hates the fact that he burns incense in his room occasionally.  Should that be such a big deal?  Also, he hates that my son's friends come in and out the basement door, instead of coming in upstairs through the house--he wants to keep an eye on them?  What should I do??  My son is a 4.0 student, has a job, always obeys curfew, and is a great kid---I tell my husband to just leave it alone, but he is STUBBORN and wants it HIS WAY!

I have to get dressed in front of people at P.E.  What do I do?

-- Remember that the other people in the locker room are just as uncomfortable as you. Don't stare, and make sure you are very clean--shower and shampoo every day, wear clean clothes, use deodorant. Know that life is not a swim suit competition. I know it is a shocker at first, but you will get used to it.

My son his wife and their 2 children 15 & 12 boys went camping over the weekend.  While they were gone the 15 year old boy friends came to the house got in stole my sons wife car and hit and ran another vehicle at a gas station.  They did other things in the house and they spent the night.   We are just finding out about some more of the details what should we do?

-- Call the police, and tell your son and his wife about all the details. I would advise the 15-year-old to make new friends.

I want to stay home from school on Septmber,11th. I am really scared. I watched a movie about it and cried all night. I draw pictures talk about it and write poetry. My mom says that if you get scared the good guys win. I need help. I am terrified!!

--There are many dates of wars, major battles and acts of terrorism. You can't stay home on all of them. I realize this one seems scarier and more real because it recently happened on U.S. soil. Can you talk to your school counselor about your anxiety?

I keep getting conflicting information about ,if I can use my British television and plumbing accessories in Spain??????????

The electrical current in Spain is 200 volts, 50 cycles AC. Plugs are of the continental type, with two round prongs.

My last period started on 12.08.06, I had unprotected sexual intercourse in the early hours of Sunday 27.08.06. As I am aware I ovulated on Saturday 26.08.06. What are my chances of becoming pregnant and when can I do a test I can't wait another week to see if I've missed my period is there anyway I can find out now. I've tried other websites and they have been useless. Please Help me.

-- Go ahead and take a pregnancy test. I once took a test a week before my period was due and it came out positive already. If it comes out negative and you still haven't had your period, take it again in a week.

The very first day I met my husband, we had a connection. We both felt very comfortable and it was so easy to be together. Things progressed quickly. We moved in together after 4 months. Never talked about marriage, but he shocked me with a proposal after a year.
 
We waited one year to get married, and have now been together for 5 years. I love him dearly- he is a GREAT guy. Always polite, always considerate. But, there is no spark. There never really has been. We didn't even have sex on our wedding night. I fear that we got married because it was comfortable. He swears that he loves me more than anything, but I am the only girl he's really been with. I had been with one person before him.
 
We're totally co-dependant. He is my comfort zone and I make ALL of the decisions. I've told him SO many times how much it bothers me that I have to "wear the pants". He even jokes to his friends that I have such a tight lease on him. I don't want it! We talk and talk and nothing happens. I've offered suggestions. I've tried to be even more passive than he is. It didn't work.
 
I've been trying to leave for a year. I love him like my best friend. The last thing I want to do is hurt him. I don't like who I am with him! I get so irritable with him. I resent him for "making me" handle everything. And of course, there is nothing happening in the bedroom- see lack of spark comment above. I feel like his mother.

You would think that's enough drama, but there's more. The same day I told him it was over, I met someone. Maybe I was vulnerable, I don't know, but I've got all of these very intense feelings that I've never had before, and I'm trying not to let it go anywhere. I cut off contact, but I still have the feelings.

I told my husband all of this. He thinks it's a phase and desperately wants to work things out. I don't want to lose my life with him. Is being comfortable and kind to each other enough? We're separated right now and I hurt him more every day. If I want to salvage this, I have to do it soon. What should I do?

-- Have you tried marriage counseling? Has he seen a doctor to find out why he has a low sex drive? The bottom line is, are you happy? Because if you aren't, it is best to end the marriage before you start having children.